EDGE

Minsan, alam mo yung feeling na para kang nakakapit sa edge ng isang bangin? yung tipong gusto mo nang bumitaw dahil pagod at nangangalay ka na?

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Just to share this with you my readers, I think, I’m on that point right now. Going through the hardships at yung hardships na yun yung unti unti ding tumutulak sa’kin pababa. You know what? I cannot understand kung bakit ako ganito ngayon, hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit ganito yung nararamdaman ko, I keep on questioning myself:

“bakit ba ako nandito sa point na ‘to?”

Oo, nagugustuhan ko naman na yung daang tinatahak ko, and I’m always praying to God na sana tama nga itong pinili ko. This second semester kasi, after all the things that I’ve done feeling ko kulang pa din e, hindi ako satisfied sa mga efforts na ginawa ko at sa mga bagay na natutunan ko mula sa mga professors ko. Feeling ko kahit anong aral yung ginawa ko nung nakaraang sem, isa pa rin akong blankong papel.

At some point parang gusto ko nang sumuko at itigil na lang ‘to but what keeps pulling me back on the track is yung mga taong naniniwala sa kakayahan ko – na kahit sa sarili ko ay hindi ko pinaniniwalaan.

Is it just the pessimist side of me? yung hindi naniniwala sa sarili kong kakayahan? Is it just part of this chapter in my life wherein I couldn’t believe in my own self?

But then, everytime that I think of it, my heart is telling me that I should go along with all of this and make things possible for me. Siguro nga, tama ‘yon, maybe I just have to sail with the flow and let God guide me, maybe I just have to believe in myself and try again and again and again. At kahit anong challenge pa ‘yan!! kakayanin ko not just for myself but for my family and for other people.

©Missteriousmisty™

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